Added by Paul 01 August 2006 11:58
I've got a response from Thames Water.
They would fill Battersea Power station every 5 days.
Added by Rach 01 August 2006 15:12
Amazing what some people will do for charity!
Added by Paul 03 August 2006 08:00
Right up my alley.
I like..
"Don't pray in my school, and I won't think in your church"
"There once was a time when all people believed in God and the church ruled. This time was called the Dark Ages."
"Jesus' last words on the cross, "My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me?" hardly seem like the words of a man who planned it that way. It doesn't take Sherlock Holmes to figure there is something wrong here."
Added by Paul 03 August 2006 08:57
Chips are not longer called 'freedom fries' in the US House of Representatives but have been restored to their rightful name 'french fries'.
For those with a short memory they were renamed after the French some resistance to joining in the war in Iraq.
I wonder if maybe the Americans wish that they'd listen.
The Iraq war feels like the longest 'I told you so' in living memory.
Added by Paul 03 August 2006 08:59
No words rqquired..
Added by Paul 05 August 2006 11:48
Superb.
Added by Paul 05 August 2006 12:26
The Daily Express. Honestly. A "mountain" of new evidence.
Added by Paul 07 August 2006 18:28
Dark days in Formula 1 - surely it has hit it's lowest ebb of all time.
It's a very sad day when someone of the 'talents' of Jenson Bighead actually wins a race.
Granted it took 113 races to achieve, and the next will likely be even longer. Granted the top three drivers all did not finish making this a hollow victory at best.
A few comments from other fans...
Pity For Jense
Here's what is so sad about Jenson's maiden F1 victory...
It will always be remembered as the race where Fernando, Michael, and Kimi all failed to finish putting it on a level with Fisichella's Jordan victory in 2003.
..Well done to Button. But let's get things straight though - when he (or anyone) says that he won it "purely on merit", come on!
.I guess every dog has his day, every broken clock shows the right time twice a day, etc. etc. At this rate, it will be another 113 races before the stars are all aligned again and ole Jense gets another win.
Added by Paul 07 August 2006 22:13
Bible bashing. But in a good way.
The christian right are happy to quote the bible when it suits. For example,
"Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it (homosexuality) to be an abomination."
Admittedly not a particularly pc view of the world.
However, there's much more madness in the bible. A few snippets
I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?
Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?
I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?
A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination - Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this?
Added by Dave 08 August 2006 09:36
Yes he is a complete w***** but I love watching him have a go at people. And most of what he says in this I agree with
Added by stones 09 August 2006 16:30
I'm not sure I really want to know what's inside - lots of willies and men's bums probably.
But seriously, this artical is chock full of fawning drivel, suggesting he can still play a bit and is not the mental lumbering wreck we all saw have a breakdown at Upton Park last season.
I particularly like this quote from Campbell himself - "I like to be a tiger roaming the jungle or an eagle soaring the skies".
Mentalist.
Added by JamesN 17 August 2006 12:40
No, I don't think he should still be in office.
But, for moments like these I think maybe I'm not so unhappy funding his lifestyle.
"Mr Cohen stressed the comment was about the specific road map policy rather a general view of President George Bush."
I'm not sure that this minor qualification of his comments will exactly get him any where near Tony's good books.
I'd love to hear some of their private conversations.
Added by Paul 17 August 2006 12:53
As it says really.
Why do people like to think that they have great innate skills?
Added by Paul 18 August 2006 09:35
Hooray for Bronze Age superstition, I say.
More than 30% of students in the UK believe in creationism.
This is little short of lunacy. Our education system is clearly failing despite appearances: I'm sure in my day not everyone got an A in A' level maths.
Next week, we'll ask kids if they believe the earth is at the centre of the universe.
Added by Paul 18 August 2006 15:44
To give you a flavour
Sign on friend's front door
Doorbell "out of order." Please "knock" or "rattle" letterbox.
On a cylinder shaped food package
"real" bacon bits
On a sign outside of a grocery store
"fresh" fruit
You get the picture.
Added by Paul 18 August 2006 15:52
From Matthew 27:46
About the ninth hour Jesus cried out in a loud voice, "Eloi, Eloi, lama sabachthani?"
This translates to "My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?"
This is a rather odd thing to say if we are to accept that Jesus was the son of God.
What can this mean?
Added by Paul 19 August 2006 15:23
The world according to Karl Pilkington.
Added by Paul 19 August 2006 15:27
Some Pilkingtonisms
· Moths are annoying. If you're going to be blind don't have wings.
· If you eat seven bananas in a row it will kill you.
· You never see an old person eating a Twix.
· His least favourite noise is the sound of a fire engine siren - "it's a bit unnecessary"
· Snails can sleep for 13 years, although "only the tired ones".
· Karl's parenting advice: "sort of look after it, feed it, make sure it's got shoes and that, but let it roam about".
· Fish have more rights than humans because there are more of them.
· With identical twins, there is always "a little snidey one".
· Pavlov used to keep hitting his dog on the head with a stick until one day, the dog said "I'm sick of this" and left.
· Old people wouldn't be happy if they had to move to Mars because they're already "set in their ways".
Added by Paul 19 August 2006 21:42
How odd..
"If a user group contains more than 500 users, the hair color of the "person" icon for the group changes to gray."
Added by Paul 20 August 2006 17:49
According to the BBC :
Iraqi civilians: 42,358
Iraqi security forces: 5,182
US military: 2,596
UK military: 115
Other coalition military: 115
Journalists: 77
Depressing.
Added by Paul 21 August 2006 10:36
My first eBay auction. Let's hope nobody wants me to meet them half way down the M3 so they can have a look at it.
Unfortunately, it has a non-reflective surface, so wasn't about to get my naked body in the photograph.
However, I did take off all my clothes during the photography of the item if that provides any reassurance.
Added by Paul 21 August 2006 10:38
.. just in case you don't know what I'm on about...
Added by Paul 23 August 2006 07:55
Proper art.
Added by Paul 23 August 2006 10:58
Worth a check every so often. This is good; some chap ordered pizza that had a problem...
Pizza Girl #1: Thank you for calling Papa John's. Just to let you know we have a special. Two large pizzas....
Me: I'm calling to complain.
Pizza Girl: Oh? What seems to be the problem.
Me: Well, my pizza got here and there's a slice missing.
Pizza Girl: Are you serious?
Me: As a heart-attack. There's a whole slice...gone.
Pizza Girl starts telling the manager about my situation.
Pizza Girl: She says there's a slice missing from here pizza.
Manager: What? Are you serious.
Pizza Girl: She says she's serious.
The manager starts laughing hysterically.
Manager: Hello, ma'am?
Me: Hi.
Manager: So, there's a slice *giggle* missing from your pizza? *laughter*
Me: Yes. I got the pizza, opened the box and there was a slice gone.
Manager: Well, how many slices does your pizza have?
Me: *pauses* You've gotta be fucking kidding me...SEVEN! There are seven slices on an EIGHT slice pizza. I am NOT RETARDED.
Okay. I didn't say that, but I sure as hell thought it.
Me: There are 7 slices.
Manager: Oh. Well, umm, I don't...this has never happened before. So, it got there like that?
Me: FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT'S HOLY...No. I ate the fucking slice of pizza and was like "oh, wtf. my slice of pizza is gone" Does she think I'm stoned? I don't sound stoned!!! Yes. It got here like that.
Manager: Do you want us to send you another pizza?
Now, this is where it gets tricky. What am I to do? At this point, I'm famished. I need something to eat. Should I wait another 45 minutes for another pizza? Fuck no.
Me: Well, I'm sorta hungry now.
Manager: Well, how about I leave this credit on your account for a free pizza for your next order?
Me: Will it have all eight slices?
Manager: *laughs* Yes, it will have all eight.
Me: Okay. Thanks.
I like the 'for the love of all that's holy'. Not as much as the Alan Sugar-ism 'while my arse has still got a whole in it..' though.
Added by Dave 23 August 2006 13:30
Humerous and educational look at the different methods
Added by stones 23 August 2006 16:41
Fantasticly named new restaurant in India.
Added by Paul 28 August 2006 14:07
Maybe I shouldn't be surprised. However, I was when I saw the most popular pages on Wikipedia.
Some highlights.
5. List of gay porn stars.
6. List of sex positions.
7. Sexual intercourse.
12. Pornography.
16. List of female porn stars.
19. Oral sex.
Added by Paul 30 August 2006 11:01
Ah. Not bad.
In a nationally televised address Monday, President Bush urged all citizens, regardless of race, creed, color, or political affiliation, "to quiet down for just one minute" so he could have "a chance to think."
...
Bush then closed his speech by exhaling sharply, tightly closing his eyes, and massaging his temples. "I just—Christ, I just need a goddamn minute, you know?" he said.
Most amusing. My views on Bush have changed of late. From out and out contempt to thinking that, if he was a mate, he would be a top laugh. He is a funny man.
Obviously he shouldn't be running a country. But that goes without saying.
Added by Paul 31 August 2006 07:37
Presumably legitmate. Cool.
Added by Paul 31 August 2006 17:07
It's the Catholics turn today..
A Vatican official has said the Catholic church will excommunicate a medical team who performed Colombia's first legal abortion on an 11-year-old girl, who was eight weeks pregnant after being raped by her stepfather.
Cardinal Alfonso Lopez Trujillo, the president of the Vatican's Pontifical Council for the Family, said in addition to the doctors and nurses, the measure could apply to "relatives, politicians and lawmakers" whom he called "protagonists in this abominable crime".
The girl, whose identity has not been released, had "fallen in the hands of evildoers", the cardinal said in an interview with local television on Tuesday.
Evildoers. Nice.
When I was growing up I always thought of religion as just a bit of harmless nonsense. Nobody believed in it as such and therefore did little harm.
Added by Paul 31 August 2006 20:52
Here's a heartwarming tale.
Pastor Franck Kabele, 35, told his congregation he could repeat the biblical miracle, and he attempted it from a beach in Gabon's capital of Libreville.
"He told churchgoers he'd had a revelation that if he had enough faith, he could walk on water like Jesus," an eyewitness told the Glasgow Daily Record.
"He took his congregation to the beach saying he would walk across the Komo estuary, which takes 20 minutes by boat. He walked into the water, which soon passed over his head and he never came back."
Maybe he just didn't have enough faith.
Or, maybe, as any rational person would suspect, there is no God. God's something that people made up in the Bronze Age. You know, when the world was flat. The earth was the centre of the universe. And stars were little holes that people in heaven had poked through.
Retrieving next posts...